“…I asked her never to repeat it again. She said she would. It was something she had always done and she would continue doing it. I requested her to think again as her actions were hurting me and everything between us was coming to a standstill. Neither of us stepped back, I was adamant on my part and she was too. We were both hardcore competitors, so between us, a face off was natural. In fact this competition was what brought us closer. Neither of us stepped back, yet again. It was time for a closure.”
This is a common closure for so many of the modern day relationships. Ego clashes – clash of thoughts – non compromising behavior and non-union of thoughts have wrecked so many relationships. At the base of each of these wrecks is just a three letter word – ego.
Relationships usually begin with a five letter word- crush, get concreted with a four letter word – love and end with a three letter word- ego. After thinking a lot on the term “ego” and its measurable effects, I presumed (without any evidence, of course) that the total ego between two people is the product of individual egos of both.
So, an ego 10 of a person A and another ego 15 of a person B leads to an ego of 150 in totality. That’s where the ‘product’ or ‘multiplicative’ relation becomes the villain. But, the ‘multiplicative’ relation also gives a fare chance to minimize the damage.
If in a relationship of two people- father + son, brother + brother, brother + sister, boss + employee, husband + wife, boyfriend + girlfriend etc – even if one of them decreases their ego to zero or even manages to come close to zero, the entire ego turns to become zero finally. Isn’t that a pretty good observation to begin with?
I really do not have any means to prove any of the above mentioned assumptions, but in a world where we assume that a particular product will improve our face complexions, may be this assumption can be tried once too. It is indeed not difficult to bring one’s ego down to zero. Just stay quiet and absorb. Just listen to what the person in front has to say. Make sure he or she is heard. Listen to understand, not to reply. That is it.
This thought came to me in 2008, when I was going through the first known individual rough phase of my life and I was also closing on my board examinations. It was only then that I realized that only if the total ego was a product, there was a chance we could someday reduce it to zero.
If you believe in this assumption and think it might work effectively, do try it. Share this formula with others; you never know you might just share the right thing at the right time.
Always ranting, Rantzaada.
The 11 o' clock diary 