I have written a lot about Nishita and a lot has been spoken about the fable. It is an interesting character that has helped me portray so much of what lay inside me. From my inner insecurities to my stellar fantasies, I have written down so much on this character’s behalf and for this character. In the past few days, I have been guzzling over a situation wherein I come across Nishita in real. In person! What do you all think would happen?
(If you haven’t read a lot about what I have written about Nishita, do read this series of 4 parts – https://the11oclockdiary.home.blog/2019/09/02/rant-the-fault-in-our-scars/)
I, in all probabilities will go numb and first will beg for pardon to have portrayed her as per my whims and wishes in whatever I have written. She is nothing but a impersonisation of a set of features and rules in my mind. I know who s Nishita for me and while I write I write her all over my mind. For a small instant of time, I become her myself.
Who is she? A new character or a fusion of part reality part imagination?
Well, if I could write in short, she is a refill. Just a refill and nothing else. She is just filling up for someone else. Someone for whom the imaginary blankets piled up and provided so much warmth to my thoughts.
You will never realise when you evolve into a refill for someone. Almost all of us are filling up for someone in people’s lives. There are just a few who crave for you. Everyone else craves for someone else and just fills up with your presence. Our life must be directed towards finding the right one who thinks you are not a refill. Search for the one who wants you in the first order. Not as a substitute, not as a re-fill. Just you. Keep looking out and when you get that one person, it will be a bliss, you will know what’s meant for you. You will know what that one thing which completes you is. Makes you what you were ought to be.
Think of people you know. For how many of them, does it seem, that you’re just a refill?
For me, Nishita sure is – a refill!
Always Ranting, Rantzaada.